Samui

Koh Samui validated my ability, as unnatural as it felt, to enjoy a beach getaway.

I generally am not a beach-goer. I have an inexplicable phobia of swimming in open water. During a family vacation to Maui years ago, my father was mortified to discover I hadn't the courage to go snorkeling, an outing he arranged especially for his swimmer daughter. I have long since tried to overcome my dread.. competing in the swimming segment of a triathlon relay, returning to Maui on my own with a snorkeling trip, snorkeling in Bali.. but beaches still don't quite agree with me.

Until Koh Samui. Picking a hotel right on the Lamai Beach, I forced myself to swim out in the bay daily, taking advantage of a nice long dock the hotel laid out to the water. The water was extremely shallow. Standing up, the waterline barely hit my hips, making for a very awkward swim with coral so freakishly close to my body. shiver

I learned the key is to have a good hotel. One with both the option of not doing anything or doing something. Being right on the beach was fantastic. Being in a villa-style room with a patio also was fantastic. Being in a resort with inclusive activities keeps boredom at bay.

I *did* confirm my inability to stay put for long. Despite lounging most of the first day, I still went for a walk to downtown, which was a sticky thirty minute walk each way. Lamai apparently turns into a sketchy bar strip for the classic old farang with barely over teenage Thai women crowd. Walking through the daytime, it was dead. The vendors sold the usual sun dresses, knock offs, uninteresting stuff. The second day I joined a tour of Samui, including an elephant ride, ATV riding, and a waterfall visit (the last was a bad idea at the end of the dry season...). The third day, an all-day trip to Ang Thong for sea kayaking. See the theme here? Cabin fever gets to me.

I had a wonderful time in Samui. The smallness of the island opens up access to more options for things to do vice the larger Phuket. My take away from this trip is to find a good resort in a good location. Sounds obvious, but, knowing my tendency and my preference, it can make or break my beach trip, especially if I travel alone.

Restaurant Review: You & Mee

Located in the ground floor of the Hyatt Hotel, it's a popular recommendation I give for our out-of-towners because of many of their fear of getting sick from the food. It's easy to miss, though, set in a corner of a little maze of hallways, it sits on a slight platform of raised hardwood which always gives me a sense of stepping onto a stage everytime I enter. There is no wall separating the dining area from the foot traffic, with only a cast iron railing, as if they were making a restaurant look like a large patio. Seats outside the store space are actually cast iron chairs with a matching glass-top table.

Food options: Buffet of a sampling selection of classic Thai dishes, a noodle bar, and a small dessert counter. A la carte, the focus is on noodles. I tried the dinner buffet once and found it underwhelming. In a city of native Thai cooking, the quality of the buffet was mediocre.

The absolute must-have: khao soi gai. Northern chicken curry noodle soup. The one Thai dish one eats with chopsticks as primary utensils vice the spoon and fork. A delicious blend of red curry paste, coconut milk, yellow noodles, and chicken. The serving size at You & Mee is huge. A boat of a bowl, really. And each time I manage to slurp the soup clean.

A worthy bargain for less than 200 baht, depending on which drink you order to supplement the dish.

Ang Thong National Marine Park

Sea kayaking in Ang Thong Marine Park was hands down one of the most enjoyable experiences I had in my multiple trips to islands and beaches in Southeast Asia. The concept of a protected water are is so startling.. and even more so to find that the Thais generally do respect the restrictions. The water, although murky, was quite clear of litter. The islands gorgeously green and untouched.

The kayaking, I went with Blue Stars. The outfit was heavily German focused. I suspect the 70% of the group that day I went came from an organised German tour. Considering one of the founders/guides is German, I wasn't surprised. We were split into two groups to rotate use of the kayaks. The German group was led by the German guide, and the English group was really the non-German group led by a silent Thai guide. We didn't get much narration from our guide, but given that our kayaks were paddling in single file, I don't feel like we missed out on the experience.

Ang Thong is largely composed of rock islands. We weaved between tunnels and crevices around the rocks on our first paddle. After lunch, we moved southward to the larger islands. The saltwater lake was largely non-event, more so when we weren't allowed access to the lake directly, just a view from a vantage point. The beaches looked gorgeous and quiet, away from the hubbub of Samui and its rowdy scene.

It's a pity we didn't have time to wander in some of the islands. I was sun-xhasted by the end of the trip, but I would imagine the islands offer a more lush and nature wildlife viewing than the more tourist trampled rain forest treks in Samui or mainland Thailand.

Don't do it: Karen Hill tribes

Many of you probably remember the National Geographic featuring the long-necked tribe in Sortheast Asia. Once I correlated the tribe with the region I am in, I was so excited to be able to go see them. The concept that we have tribes still practicing such exotic traditions in the world of global market and influence was so fascinating.

A bit of background: The Karen tribe is originally from within Myanmar borders. The women wear brass rings around their neck.. and add rings throughout their adolescence. It like the neck has been elongated, but in reality the collarbone and the ribs are being pushed down to a point that they need to keep the rings on to live.

As soon as we went to Chiang Rai, I booked a tour to see the hilltribes the next day. We then walked to the Hilltribe Museum (Which is a do, by the way) to get some background perspective. The museum was like a home-run shop. The exhibits were laid out in corked bulletin boards, laid out along the wall, like someone's packrat attic room. No glass enclosures. Descriptions were printed in regular home printers and glued onto construction paper backing, taped into the wall. Yet, the museum was one of the best I've been to in Southeast Asia. Informative, factual, and narrative. Including a lot of warnings about the tours offered to see the hilltribes. None of the proceeds in the typical tours go towards the villages that the people ask to go gawk at. And more often than not, the villages were notified that they would become the subject of that gawking.

The Karen tribes were worse. The notion that the Karens migrated to Thailand to flee the Burmese.. If it ever was true, it was a long enough time ago. The current "tribes" people see are imported. Businessmen bring in the women, not the men since they look normal, into Thailand, knowing that they are subjects of great tourist curiosity. The "villages" aren't real. They are just artificial sites of tourist traps. In reality the neck ring tradition has been dying out.

We walked out of the museum highly enlightened but feeling like scum encouraging the black human market. The actual visit the next day validated that and clarified what articles meant by calling it a "human zoo". The women were placed in a windy path of huts. The huts were three-walled bamboo structures with a loom on one side for the women to weave, in full view of visitors. The other half had the woven scarves hung up  and a area for the women to sit prettily to be seen. Supposedly the only means the women earn are from the scarves they sell, so we bought them up by the bunch. They were different from the usual mass produced "handmade Thai silk" in the markets, and truly interesting, but admittedly we did it out of our guilt as well.

My curiosity got the worst of me. To future visitors, I warn: don't do it. Not only does is encourage the human trade and cruel marketing of women, it wasn't even a good visit. A strong sense of artificiality, fakeness permeated the whole place.

Restaurant Review: Bo.lan

We went with a group that turned out much larger than expected... 14 total with a grand sum of 6 rsvp'ing. Can I say how irritated I get when people don't respond? It is, to me, plain rude to not provide a host or organizer some perspective of how many s/he has to accommodate. It is not difficult to say "yes" or "no." In truth, I don't mind restaurant miscalculations as much as I mind house party miscounts but I'm on my rant box now. Back in the States, I had participants who had the nerve to say "I am very bad about rsvpíng because I can't decide." To me, that's a slap in the face, an "I'm waiting to see if anything more exciting gets planned instead." A simple "no" would have been enough.

Anyway, Bo.lan. We tend to go out to Italian restaurants.. they are the ones more conducive to a Friday evening dinner and drinks atmosphere and because it is far easier to find a mid-range Italian with cocktails. One guest found out early on that this restaurant's beer selection is rather limited. I believe Beer Laos was the one they failed to stock up on. Even their cocktail list seem limited although they do list all the liquors on hand, allowing us to specify any mixes.

Bo.lan is a chef's restaurant. The chef likes to dictate the contents of the dinner table. The recommended approach to dining is to go for the pricey set menu which includes four or more main courses to eat family style. Or Asian-style. The chef rotates his menu every two months, keeping the current selection small but encouraging fans to return for a variation.

The restaurant mandated, though, that all off the table had to get the set menu if anyone opts for it. In other words, we couldn't have three set menu portions then add a la carte dishes to supplement. So with that, we all ordered a la carte. Given that half the table were out-of-town visitors, we had trouble trying to convince them to open up and eat family style.

The chef clearly felt strongly about giving us a balanced selection. He went as far as to come out of the kitchen to talk to us. A farang chef cooking Thai food. He requested having the leeway to mix up the dishes for us because seven people ordered the same curry. (Gee, I wonder. Penang anyone??) Two of us, residents, didn't give anyone a chance to argue and promptly gave him our blessings. This also has got to be the first restaurant where we were asked upon ordering if we had any food allergies.

The food was delicious. The Thai dishes were all recognizable. But not blandly common. The spices were well blended yet very distinct. The portions were small, Thai size. We could have used four penang curries vice the two we ended up with. It truly was a gastronomic experience and one of the better, although, expensive Thai restaurants I have been, ever.